Distinction in God's eyes

Oh my goodness... Ya it's so OMG for me...
How many of you think practicum is coming to an end?
Nie trainees all raise hand
How many of you think you can relax this two weeks ahead?
Nie trainees all raise hand

my ct just called me, she said
'Celestine, we have decide to give you a chance for moderator to come in for your distinction. Of course, there are room for improvement here and there but we feel that your lessons are well planned and you have improved.'

To me, the moderator doesn't matter.
To me, after hearing what my cts said, that is already my distinction.

Thank you God for giving me this chance to be recognized.
I'm no longer concern about the outcome or the moderator.
I have got my distinction in God's eyes. :)

I fall in awe of an awesome God who covers me in all season.

So as I prepare for the as my supervisor describes as 'stressful moderator coming' period...
Please pray that I look to Him in all seasons.
Not to fear being judged by ppl but
remember my grades are lifted up to my great God

Practicum =)

my dear blog have the honour to be my listening ear today =p

Let me see!

Today i was reminded to give thanks for blessings that GOD give to me.
Being worried about my observations time and time again but GOD reminded me that whenever i do my best, GOD will do the rest. So, i should not be so caught up with results!

Today, i had a pretty good lesson observation and i would like to give the honour to GOD.

Of course and my super cute class =) haha a bunch a teachable cute kids =)
Totally enjoy teaching them!

Well, THANK YOU GOD for seeing me through this observation.

3 cleared 7 more to go. OH my GooOdness not even halfway there yet!

God i need more of your strength and power.
but
but
but,

through it all, i remind myself constantly,
results/ affirmation/ wanting to be "recognised" should be secondary
but

to do my best in what GOD called me to do!


Thank you GOD for constantly reminding me =)

The Promise

I love you
And I will never leave you
Nor forsake you
And I love you
And i will never leave you

you are my child
you are my child
when you're down
when your heart is broken
when no one seems to care
please know that I love you

cuz you are my child
you are my child
and i want to wrap my arms around you
and i want to wrap my arms around you
and say everything,everything will be alright

you are my child
you are my child
let me wipe those tears from your eyes
let me wipe those tears from your eyes

come to me
come to me
come to Jesus
come to him
come to Jesus
come to him

The lyrics from MERCY ME - The Promise

Until you suddenly realise GOD's love is the most comforting thing i own, i start to cherish that feeling so much.

GOD,

Thank you for loving me.
Thank you for your promise.
Thank you for comforting me.
Thank you for being there when i'm alone.
Thank you for letting every single word in this song comfort me.

what will i do without you.

.reality.

I thought...
I really wanted...
It's like a desire...
it's like a celebration i thought

but sometimes, you just have to let it go...

i thought...
I really wanted..
but i realised...
It isnt like i'm achieving something fabulously great after two years..
it isnt like i'm getting a cap..
it isnt that special that i'm finishing this season...
it's just changing season..
it isnt worth celebrating...
so

why feel a need to celebrate so grandly..
just move on to your next phrase of life...
so...

i let go.
they're nothing but just wishful desires.

Dedicated to Ming Xuan (05 Jan 03) =)

Ming Xuan,

So fast it's 5th December again.

Although mostly every year without fail i would go to the grave, i decided to give it a miss this year. It isnt because i have forgotten to do so =) But because i want to tell myself that going to the grave on this day is not just a ritual that i practice yearly but it is a way i remember you with. It is so easy to get carried away thinking it is a ritual huh~

Today i was reading the book "The Lovely Bones" (a perspective from heaven)...
As i read the book, i pondered about heaven and how it was like.
haha so, where are you at i wonder? Definitely safe with GOD! haha but i wonder if u actually can see me typing this.. thats quite cool...

SEVEN years already. Time really flies.
sometimes i wonder how you would be if you really grew up like us. =)

It has come to a point i celebrate 7 years that you've left to a better place =)
It's no longer something sad but something to rejoice.

So long dear friend =)
P.S. Read the book "THE LOVELY BONES"

2010

Reflections:

I know.. i'm probably the worst child of GOD in 2009. I havent took time to reflect 09 because i know how much i probably have disappointed GOD and so i know i didnt want to do so. Today as i worship GOD with the chorale and the congregation for 3 services i was reminded so many things. I was packing my cupboard and i came across my diary dated 2003. I saw so many entries that would scold myself whenever i dont pray.. i also came across many entries that i wrote out my prayers.. 2003 = Sec 3... i saw that passion i had for GOD that i lost in 2009 which was why i decided as much as i dont want to reflect, i had to.

I remember standing outside butter factory on the eve eve of new year last week. I saw people who would find joy in other things like drinking, and ppl who join the crowd walking not knowing where they are heading. As a rather drunk guy came up to us and say " THIS IS THE DECADE of ours and we have to live it up because 10 years later we will be busy with kids family and stuff" I reflected and realise to him... this 10 years ahead was for him to party it away. I thought... what about me? am i going to "waste" or "party" away this Decade that (like he say) we own?

This was my passing thought on that day....

GOD does not let passing thought just go like that.. the day of new year, i attended dawn prayer. Pastor said "THIS 2010 is OUR DECADE .. and along the same line that we have to live it up" I was thinking .. two very different people (a clubber and a pastor) saying the SAME statement... i was just amazed at how GOD was pointing to me NOT to waste this decade away but to grow and root deep and serve because THIS is OUR decade. Indeed that dawn prayer i realised how i wasted 2009 away.. but GOD's grace and love for me is still unending.. NOTHING can beat being in the presence and dwelling in HIS presence..

I was definitely assured of GOD's love when i served this SUNDAY THREE services. One thing about worship is that from the stage time and time again i see people crying and tearing because i look down and i see GOD's love pouring and outflowing into them that it is so overwhelming. GOD presence is so mightly felt and seen whenever i look down into the congregation...

I know... I KNOW GOD loves us..

I know GOD loves me.. i know GOD loves you.

THANK GOD for 2009.
Sorry for 2009.

but

2010 is here and i will live it for you Lord.

Thanksgiving Post

Have been slightly busier going out and stuff after the TNG camp but i decided to blog down some of my thanksgiving and reflections.

Firstly, I thank GOD for opening my eyes and heart for the youth. I guess while i shuttled between the group and org com, i still thank GOD for allowing me to spend most my time with the youth in my group and hanging out with them. There was a long session where i had the opportunity to pray and share with a few youth. It opened my heart and eyes to see that these youth needed someone to pray and guide them. Therefore, i would say the TNG camp definitely opened my eyes and give me great anticipation with the changes that the youth ministry is going to have.


Secondly, I thank GOD for good grades. I wouldnt deny that sem and sem again i look at my grades and tell GOD how undeserving i think i am to get such good grades. I am only reminded that it is only by HIS grace that my grades are well. Although it still didnt reach my 4.5 gpa that i was aiming to target, but i recognise that what i have is GOD given and is defintely better.

So, THANK GOD for my 4.39 (although my grades seem to increase at a constant rate of 0.02 each sem) haha.. =)

Thank GOD for some catchups with su xian, hao, wanmei, edi... just lacking the fArt fam..

My Thanksgiving this month of December.

....In memories....

I write this in memory and in reflection of a life that now lives in our memory but definitely taught us some things....

This was what kept going through my mind at mandai...

In life we get to cross our path with someone just for that moment, but we often fail to realise the importance of sharing the gospel...

At that moment i felt the need to share.. because..
if only he had a chance to respond to u...
If only someone asked him that question...

It may not be our mission to bring him to Christ but...
at least share and ask...

God, i was reminded so so so reminded to share and not regret the next time or rather each time...

well, in loving memories..(as i wrote in the book)
It has been fun:

Beating NIE orientation Queue for us
Virtual NIE tour
Attending all our Friday morning lectures
East Coast Park

and this is how i remember u best by how u communicate with Amanda ..

But i know for sure...

GOD is still good through it all..

God is our Healer

Ming Xuan...The first person who taught me what was death was you and i thought of you... You taught me what was it like to lose a friend but I know someday God will let us meet once again. But most importantly God taught me how to overcome it and remember u still.

Today I grief the lost of another it's a very unreal feel but this time God teach ppl to grow stronger thru u alone.u have a glorious plan for her so please teach her grow herand empower her. Though this trip I don't know where this friend of mine is heading, I just pray for grace and mercy upon Him...

God is our Healer

The first person who taught me what was death was you and i thought of you... You taught me what was it like to lose a friend but I know someday God will let us meet once again. But most importantly God taught me how to overcome it and remember u still.

Today I grief the lost of another it's a very unreal feel but this time God teach ppl to grow stronger thru u alone.u have a glorious plan for her so please teach her grow herand empower her. Though this trip I don't know where this friend of mine is heading, I just pray for grace and mercy upon Him...